Sexual FAQs
Q. I’m getting a lot of UTIs (urinary tract infections), can this be from oral sex?
A. Yes it could be, but see your gynecologist for a urine culture to find out exactly what organisms are causing your bladder infections. You could also see your general health care person, either way have a urine culture done. They may not be from oral sex, but from your own bacteria. If you are getting “a lot”, do your body a favor and get it checked out.
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Q. I am a lesbian, do I need an annual pap smear?
A. YES, absolutely! It’s your body, take care of it. You can still get cervical cancer, although the rate is probably much lower among lesbians. I don’t know of any studies done to date on this. Also, you may not know if your partner has had sexual intercourse with a man and may have gotten the Human Papillomavirus. See HPV or genital warts for more.
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Q. I have a very dry vagina and it makes sex or foreplay very uncomfortable. Help?
A. Think LUBRICATION! There are lots of products on the market today, most can be bought via the internet or at your local Walmart, Walgreens, CVS, etc. Try “Wet”, “Astroglide” or even generic KY jelly (water that down a bit). *The new KY ‘Warming Liquid’ creates a warming sensation and is a product that you might want to try. They tend to be a bit expensive, but a little goes a long way and all that I mentioned are safe to use with latex condoms. There are also silicone based lubricants. These claim to “never dry out” and are condom friendly. Look for my upcoming article on “Lubricants”.
Another thing that might be an issue is lack of foreplay. Maybe you are just not sexually aroused enough. Take your time before sex, lots of kissing and fondling should stimulate vaginal secretions.
Or, you might be taking a medication (like an antihistamine or antidepressant) that do tend to dry out all your mucous membranes, including the vagina. If this is the situation, you should use a lubricant. Sometimes water helps too, but have a towel handy!
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Q. How can I have multiple orgasms? I am able to have one easily, but this frustrates my husband.
A. Practice often helps. Practice by yourself if that helps you. Your second orgasm usually occurs soon after the first, so continue with intercourse as long as you don’t have to worry about the risk of pregnancy or STDs. (You’re married, I’ll assume you both are monogamous). Talk about what is ‘working for you’ as far as getting you to orgasm the first time and let it happen, don’t obsess over it. If he can keep going, you’ll most likely get there! 🙂
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Q. I am HIV positive and so is my boyfriend. I’m on the pill. Do we still need to use condoms?
A. Yes. There is more than one strain of HIV (the CDC doesn’t want to scare people, so they don’t talk about that enough), that’s what viruses do, they mutate. You may actually have a different ‘strain’ of HIV than your b/f. So, yes, use a condom. Your viral load may also be different than his. For more on HIV and treatment check out these links. Good question, stay healthy, see your health care provider regularly and take your meds on time.